Imagine: four smooth walls, the ceiling, the floor, and you. Nothing more. That’s all there is. Everything is uncomfortably bare with the one exception of the inner space of your mind, which is full of thoughts. Now imagine that this inner space has quieted as well and you are listening to pure silence. Creepy, even spooky might be the first words that come to mind when we picture a silence and solitude this extreme. But just stick with the image for a moment longer.
From the moment we arise in the morning, the sound of noise continually pesters our minds. Like a chain reaction it begins with the alarm, then the radio, then on to conversations, people asking questions, cars, machines, and most of all, ourselves and our own thoughts. Noise is overwhelmingly present in our world, yet we take so little notice of it. And we need it, we unknowingly beg for it. How often do you drive without nonchalantly flipping on the radio? How many times do we go home without turning on the TV at all? We even hate silence in conversations because it creates cringe-worthy awkwardness. We seek and crave noise because this is what we are used to. Yet noise loses its meaning when it is severed from silence.
A few weekends ago, I went on a silent retreat at a monastery nearby. Maybe this sounds intense, but it was merely a response to an invitation combined with the pursuit of some sweet peace of mind and rest. Originally, I thought it might just be kind of like a mini vacation. No noise, no work and lots of sleep. Sounds great doesn’t it? To me, this sounded like bliss.
Little did I realize how much listening I would be doing on this silent retreat.
Silence is often understood as a vast nothingness of noise that we avoid so much. But what I came to understand on this retreat was the beauty of a language that has been so frequently forgotten and despised, but is unquestionably rich with meaning. Silence truly is one of God’s languages, whereby he speaks to us in words far too beautiful to actually say. To hear and understand this language takes immense focus and peace, but the effects are incredible. I would liken it to Mary’s discovery in The Secret Garden when she stumbles upon a clandestine world within the very house she inhabits. After this discovery, she simply cannot stop returning for more because she is drawn by an awe of the garden’s silent, spontaneous beauty. In the same way, silence is our own world which we may retreat to whenever needed. Each of us bears a place for silence within us, it is merely up to us to find the key to this inner room.
So go ahead and begin the study of this hidden language. Within it, I hope you find a peace far greater than words, answers more perfect than most, and words with which to communicate with Him who is always listening.
